Thursday 26 May 2022

June 2022 Ambushed by Grief

Reflections No 1: Ambushed by grief

Reflections No 2: Taking stock
Taster Circles and the next Compass Rose programme: 'Weaving Shadow and Light'

Dare to Blossom Monthly Circles on Zoom - a choice of day and time

Reflections No 1: Ambushed by grief

I had begun writing a practical piece about taking stock as we come to the middle of 2022, and then... this morning grief  sprang up and slapped me - anyone who has ever lost someone (or experienced any other grief, (here are many losses in our lives), will know this feeling I am sure.

Scrolling through my ‘memories’ on Facebook, as I enjoy doing each morning, with all the photos of my walks and fun things I have shared on this day over the years, there it is - a sweet photo of someone who died suddenly. And here come the tears.

The words above were the ones I chose to share with my community on Facebook, some of whom know me very well, and others less so. I also wrote: "PS I chose this painting as I don’t want
to share the photo, and the bright sparks of connection are still there."



The photo that 'ambushed' me was taken in 2015, by the motorcycle dealers where my brother bought a classic motorbike - I remember being surprised then as my brother didn't take part in Facebook as far as I know, but presumably he had given them permission. I had shared their post, and had forgotten - even though I imagine it would have popped up last year too.

I thought of sharing that photo here, and now I have decided not to do that, maybe another time, maybe not.

Anyway, somehow, today, it had an impact. Maybe we prepare, whether consciously or not, for the anniversaries when we expect to be thinking of people no longer with us - birthday, Christmas, the significant dates around a diagnosis maybe, and then those connected with a death and a funeral. 


Life and death, and grief, are all part of life. Today I was humbled by the messages of support I received in reaction to my Facebook post. And - I know that grief is always with me, for all the losses in my life.

I am currently reading
Lamentations of the Sea by Dr BethAnne Kapansky Wright (2nd Edition 2019, Golden Dragonfly Press), about the author's grief at losing her brother suddenly, written at the time, so her words are sometimes raw and very moving. The subtitle is "111 passages on grief, love, loss, and letting go" - I have been dipping in and reading it slowly and gradually. Some passages are prose, some poetry, some short, some longer.

Here is a short piece, number 11, on page 19:

 

The very thing that ails you
in this darkest of place
is the very thing
that will eventually see
you through to the light

Love is both wound and balm

 

I am not feeling in 'the darkest of places' now, yet this chimes with my thoughts earlier, that we only feel grief when we lose someone, or something, we love, or that is important to us.

In another piece, on page 26 entitled 'Heart', there are these words:


"Your heart is doing what it is built to do: love, feel, break, heal.",
and "Don't be afraid to let it do what it needs to do to release, remember, repair, renew."


As I mentioned above when I shared the piece I wrote on Facebook, there are so many losses in life, and often we do not take time to grieve, to feel, to allow, and to move on. Some losses are connected with change, a change that may be positive - changing jobs or moving house perhaps - and yet there is sadness, and maybe grief, in saying goodbye. A celebration as well as a letting go.


Reflections No 2: Taking stock

And so, after that 'ambush',  I have decided to leave the piece I had begun on 'Taking stock' here for you too.

The sixth month of the year is almost here. I am sure you, like me, often reflect on the strange nature of time. Sometimes proceeding so slowly, at others flying by. Sometimes feeling, for me at least, as if it loops around itself, bringing memories of long ago that feel like they were yesterday.


For me this time, the middle of the year, of this year 2022, is a perfect time to pause, to take stock. And then - to take action. I have literally have been taking stock, of books, paintings, and the Dare to Blossom Rediscovery Cards. Those have not exactly been 'flying off the shelves' in marketing-speak. Quite rightly, people tend to take their time to consider whether, and when to buy - but even so packs of the Original cards and the No 2 decks have been steadily wending their way to people around the world.

For me, it is good to be mindful of how we spend our money  - and not simply for financial reasons. I like to remember the saying people use for decluttering: "Is this useful? Is this beautiful? Does this bring me joy?" before I make the decision to buy anything new (or secondhand, in the case of many of my books).




Here are the cards from a recent circle - such a wonderful selection of words and colours. Some from the Original Deck, many from No 2 - I use them mixed together.

For your own reflections or meditation - today you may like simply to choose one or more of the words to flow-write with and see where that takes you?

  • What is your first response to the word?
  • To the colour?
  • What else is there?
  • And, what else?
  • What does a second card add to the first?


Taster Circles and the next Compass Rose programme: 'Weaving Shadow and Light'

The next Compass Rose six-week programme begins on 20th June. Midsummer, or midwinter, always feels the perfect time to follow this theme. I rewrite some of the material every time, and in any case, if you have been before, you will know how different and special each particular 'turn around the Compass Rose' is each time. The people are different, you are different.



I chose this favourite image to illustrate the programme this time. Is the darkness inside the tree intriguing? Scary? A little of both? What is inside? A staircase going down? Or up? A fairy grotto? A magical cottage with a warm fire, a comfy sofa, a kettle already boiling ready to make a pot of tea? (These could be some more writing or meditation prompts for you.)

There are three taster circles scheduled, at times I hope will suit people in different parts of the world - the final decision on when we will meet during the programme will emerge as people experience the process n the tasters. I will offer two times each week if that is best, although it is always good to all meet together live on Zoom when we can. Read more here....

Taster Circles:
Thursday 9th June at 2.30 pm or 7.30 pm (UK times)
Thursday 16th June at 2.30 pm - I may add another that day if there are any requests. 
 

You are welcome to attend any or all of these, and there is no expectation that you will sign up for the six weeks, it is always wonderful to have your company. Contact me for the Zoom links, and find out more by following this link, or by clicking on the photo above.

Dare to Blossom Monthly Circles on Zoom - a choice of day and time

The drop-in circles are held twice each month The next dates are Saturday 11th June at 11.00 am and Monday 27th June at 7.30 pm (UK times). You can find the events on Facebook or LinkedIn,  or simply reply to this email and ask me for the Zoom link. It is a always pleasure to welcome those of you who prefer not to connect via social media, all you need to join us is the Zoom link that I send to you in advance of the time.

Payment is by donation, depending on your circumstances. People offer from zero to £30. I host the circles with no expectation, simply deep gratitude for your presence. 



I send wishes for health and happiness for you and all you love.

Thank you for joining me here this month, any thoughts, feedback, or questions are always welcome.

 

Mary

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