Thursday 30 May 2013

Fun


I love this card, such a short word - meaning that the letters can be printed very large And the zinging, vibrant pink is full of life and joy. It feels like a bouncy, happy card. Going through the week with this as my card has made me think about how often I don't let myself have fun. I can see one part of me, almost as a separate person, standing there, one hand on her hip, the other wagging a finger at me, her lips pursed, saying "Tut, tut, you shouldn't be having fun. Life is a serious business, don't you know."

Another part wants to giggle and skip and say "Why not?" The saying "Angels fly because they take themselves lightly."* comes to mind. As does a story from the USA about "Rule Number Six".(If you don't know this story, have a look
here). Basically, a reminder to keep a sense of humour at all times and see the ridiculous in ourselves.

So, when my severe self pops up, perhaps I can persuade her to relax and have some fun. And what do I count as fun? Things that make me laugh. Sometimes things that make me cry, such as a moving story in a book or a sad film.Things that have no 'reason' to them. Doodling, playing with paint and creative bits and pieces (not to make anything particular). Watching clouds and playing the 'shapes' game. (I saw a perfect pony's head the other day with a sweet nose and his ears forward.) Lying on the grass on a warm night looking at the magical sky and hoping to see a shooting star.

Writing this has also reminded me that I can decide almost anything is fun if I want to. Sitting somewhere waiting (doctor, dentist, train station, airport) - there are many things I can turn into fun. I may not always be in the mood to do that - my choice, but I can if I wish.

I have also noticed how the 'Fun' card adds an extra dimension to my list of cards: Honesty, Wisdom, Angels and Learning. Child-like fun is a joy. The fun that has no ill-intent, that is joyous and inclusive, life enhancing and health-giving. Why not be unreasonably happy, happy with no reason? Yes, I will choose to be unreasonably happy as a practice to add to remembering to breathe deeply, and not taking myself too seriously.

(*until I looked it up, I had no idea that saying is attributed to the writer G K Chesterton)


Tomorrow is the end of my first month of sharing my experience of the Rediscovery Cards with you, and I will be reflecting on that in the June newsletter that most of you also receive.  There is still a chance (up to 5.00 pm 31 May) for you to be in the draw to win either a set of cards or a phone/Skype Rediscovery Session (plus the cards) - just send me a comment below or by email to enter.  Thank you to everyone who has contacted me so far, please continue to share your thoughts, I do appreciate knowing there is someone out there!

Until next week, may all be well in your world,

Mary


Thursday 23 May 2013

Learning


23 May 2013

Well, how interesting! When I set myself a challenge to write about each of the cards, to share with you honestly and openly, to include as much of my flow writing as I could - when I set myself this challenge, I thought I might come up against a block at some stage.

I didn't expect that to happen on only week four out of fifty! By the time you read this I hope I will have recovered my equilibrium, been able to step back and observe my reactions, and use my first three cards of Honesty, Wisdom, and Angels to take me through this bump in the road. Beginning to reflect on 'Learning', I wrote some words then had a wobble wondering how you would receive it, if you would think badly of me, if ..., if...., etc. Having grappled with the internal critics and censors, the writing below is pretty well intact. Then the arrival of the 'Thoughts from the Universe' piece in my in-box today made me smile:


"Behind your greatest fear, Mary, lies your greatest gift. And your greatest gift, Mary, will be the example you become."

I hope my example, in spite of (or maybe because of) my struggles, will prove to be a gift in some way to you.

This is one of those words that can bring the 'oh no' reaction. Oh no, surely I've learnt enough, not more 'lessons' in life? During this time of my own coming home to myself, of rediscovering my own wisdom, I have begun to see the idea of 'learning' in a different light. When I first began on my path of personal growth many years ago, I'd hear people talking about the lessons to be learnt from the horrible things that happened, in my case one of those was having cancer. I could find myself in a spiral of wondering why my lessons were so hard, if maybe they were a punishment of some sort, even if I had brought them on myself - 'all my fault'. I could feel in a trap of circular thinking: if I can choose my thoughts and my feelings and change my life, why did life sometimes seem so bad?

Gradually I have been able to escape from this trap (though it is easy for me to slip back into it too). My personal view of the events of my life have changed - through my own experiences, through talking with friends, reading many books - I have, yes, 'learned', that I can choose to take another view. I can connect with my eternal self, my higher consciousness, my soul (any term you like to use). I can observe the physical body and the human mind attached. Begin to see how my reactions and my experiences are interwoven, how I forget that the light within is undiminished whatever happens to my body. That my light is a spark making up part of the whole.

......... This was my first piece of flow-writing on drawing this card, and I am interested in just how it flowed. My internal critic is now jumping in and suggesting that maybe I should not share it with you. Maybe you don't share my views, maybe you will be offended, maybe you won't  like what I have written. And now the critic is even laying into that - maybe readers will now feel I am being patronising or condescending? But stop! You know that you can accept or reject my views, that they don't need to have any affect on you, unless you choose.

....Isn't it interesting, what a tangled web I have woven trying to be what I think people want me to be rather than just being me. So I choose to step back again and observe the chorus of internal critics piping away over there. I choose to be kind to myself.  "Learning" - I am always learning, or discovering, new things and facts. And I am rediscovering myself afresh. I can share with you in my own way, my own voice. Each writer, however unknown or however famous, has something to say that will reach particular people in a special way that will deliver a message to them.

Having navigated all that convoluted thinking - finally in my musings this week: the colour of the background of this card. The soft purple is peaceful, and also powerful. A colour associated with spirituality, healing and creativity. A colour I have always loved, especially in nature in flowers such as the "glory bush" flower below, or in velvety irises and petunias.

Glory Bush
 
Thank you for sharing my ups and downs this week, any comments or thoughts you would like to leave below would be very helpful for me..

Onward with our shared rediscovery!

Mary

Thursday 16 May 2013

 

Angels

16 May 2013
I smiled when I drew this card, as I had been thinking about it just the day before. When I designed the cards in December 2011, it was with the intention of using them at the Daring to Blossom workshops during 2012. They worked really well, with the special twist that people could take their card away with them if they wished as I could easily replace them. After a while, people started asking me if they could buy a pack for themselves. I began thinking how I could describe them, how the Dare to Blossom Rediscovery Cards were different to all the other beautiful packs out there (and I use various different ones regularly for myself).

One thing is that they do not have any associated belief system, such as with tarot cards, goddess cards, medicine cards - or angel cards. Then of course I realised that among the 50 words that I had chosen was this one 'Angels'. I reflected on what the word 'angels' means to me. I have known many people in my life who I could describe that way. People who go out of their way to help others, with no expectation of recognition or reward. I have also had experiences of near escapes or warnings that have felt to me as if some unseen presence was watching over me - perhaps my 'guardian angel', or my own intuition coming in to help. Whatever your beliefs are I hope that you will find this card useful to reflect on too. And if not (as with any card that you may draw), you can choose not to 'connect' with this word at all. Sometimes however, I find when I have a negative reaction to a word on a card - "Oh no, I don't want that one!" - it is when it is actually most useful for me to reflect on that quality.

So, for this card, the background colour is the same blue as the 'Wisdom' card from last week.  a celestial sky blue, the sort of blue you might see on a slightly hazy summer's day, or at sunset. Today, it reminds me of my mother, she had wonderful blue eyes, eyes that twinkled with delight and fun. She was interested in everyone and everything, ready with a suggestion to help. She would tell a story of meeting a woman one day who seemed upset, and listening to her worries about her son who was about to start secondary school but was plagued by bullies who would be at the same school. My mother simply suggested that maybe she could ask for him to go to a different school (this was in the days before 'parental choice' became usual). Many years later she was approached in the street by the same woman who began "You won't remember me...." and said that her son had just graduated and started a good job. She told my mother  her suggestion had changed her son's life and she had been hoping to express her gratitude for years: "You were our angel in disguise."


Reflecting on this card during the week, I have looked out for my own angels in disguise (and there are many of them) and remembering to thank them. I have also been more aware of when I could respond more kindly to others, pausing for a moment to think if I can offer anything. Sometimes it is not appropriate, or welcome, to talk to people, but often just a simple smile can make all the difference in someone's day. We may not know the effects of our actions, but we can do, and be, the best we can in any moment however imperfect that may feel..

In this third week of sharing with you, I am finding that the previous two cards are staying with me as well. During my busy days I pause sometimes to think how I can apply 'Honesty' or how my inner 'Wisdom' would respond in any situation. So this week I will have 'Angels' with me too. Each of you, dear readers, play that role in my life - by being interested enough to stay subscribed to my newsletters, by reading them when you have time, and by occasionally replying - you are a valued part of my 'support team'. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

A thought that made me smile - as the weeks go on, it may become a bit like one of those memory test games if I try and remember the whole list of cards and the order they were drawn. I'm not sure for how long I will be able to recite the list, I do know that the effects of having paused and thought about these qualities is proving a powerful method of rediscovery for me.


So, until next week, goodbye for now - and don't forget that anyone who sends me a comment (by email or by writing below) about these weekly musings will be entered in the draw on 1 June to win one prize of a pack of cards and a Rediscovery Session on the phone or Skype, or two additional prizes of packs of cards. 

with all best wishes,

Mary

Thursday 9 May 2013

What I live for?

Today (10 May) I'm taking part in 'What I Live For', an online event organised by author Satya Robyn. People like me all over the world will be sharing what gives their lives meaning. In Satya Robyn's novel 'Thaw', Ruth gives herself three months to decide whether she can find a reason to carry on living. There's 75% off the kindle version today (99p / $1.49) - read more here:



Morning Glory flower
The Morning Glory plant produces new flowers each day: every day the new buds open and share their inner glory with the world.


What an inspiring metaphor for starting each day afresh, living in the moment and daring to blossom!

All the work I do is about personal growth and spiritual awareness: each of us, everyone, is already perfect. We can grow as we become aware that each of us has that seed within, like the Morning Glory. A seed has everything within it to develop into the full glory of the plant, just needing the right conditions and nurturing.

'Growth' does not mean that you need to be more  than you are, or do more or have more. Growth is becoming the fullest and most glorious expression of who we are, living in our full glory. 'Awareness' helps us to see and to live in this knowledge, day by day.

This is a special time of year for me as on 12 May I was called into my doctor's surgery to be told I had been diagnosed with cervical cancer. That was nineteen years ago and was the start of a journey of personal growth for me, and the anniversary is now a time of celebration. Every year I renew my commitment to living each day to the full.

Wisdom


9 May 2013
In my second week of drawing cards to share with you I began by reflecting on the process. It will be different in that I am removing the card from my pack when it is drawn 
 to ensure that I will cover all 50 over the next year. This means that I will not be demonstrating that interesting and sometimes frustrating phenomenon of drawing the same card more than once. If you experience this with your own cards, as I often have, reflect on the gift of that quality staying with you.

It is early days yet, but I am also finding that I am focusing so much on this that each card is staying with me more than perhaps if I had not been sharing it. This has shown me how much value there is in giving something full attention, a lesson important to me when I feel sometimes surrounded by so much - so much knowledge, information, resources, books - all wonderful things. So much that maybe I forget to pause and access my own wisdom. That wisdom that I have inherited, that I learnt from my parents, from people as I was growing up, teachers of all kinds. That wisdom that has been distilled and integrated through my own experiences to be something unique to me. You have your wisdom too.

The colour of the background, a cool aqua/green shade, feels calming and soothing to me, cooling the nerves and any over reaction, having the wisdom not to be 'hot-headed' perhaps.

'Wisdom' also reminds me of the
Serenity Prayer by Rienhold Niebuhr

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can,
And wisdom to know the difference.


You may find that the photos of the cards are sometimes 'skew-whiff' (I love that expression!) - this is because I took all 50 of the photos outside on a lovey calm sunny day in order to show the colour as true as possible for you, and as you will imagine, it took quite a while. I felt it was more authentic to show them to you just as they are, as you might have shuffled and drawn one out and put it down.

This is only my second week of sharing these reflections with you, I am already finding that it is deepening my reflections and giving the experience more meaning - so thank you to everyone reading for sharing this with me. I have found the two qualities of honesty and wisdom helping me pause and think during my busy days.

Finally, there will be another post on the blog this week in addition to this as I am taking part
 in 'What I Live For', an online event organised by author Satya Robyn on 10 May (tomorrow, and with a special offer on her book). It is a significant time for me as 12 May is the anniversary of my diagnosis with cervical cancer - 19 years ago this year - a time to celebrate life for me.

So - thank you for reading, please do comment below and share your thoughts - it will help me feel less lonely putting these thoughts out into the world like tender green shoots. It would be good to know there is a warm friendly environment out there rather than frosts and biting cold winds.

Until next week,

Mary

Friday 3 May 2013

Photo of 'Honesty' card, white text on orange background

2 May 2013

This is the first of my experiments of sharing my own insights with you. Everyone who has so far replied has preferred a newsletter rather than blog. If you do not wish to receive these messages, please use the 'unsubscribe' link at the bottom of the page. You will remain subscribed to the monthly Dare to Blossom Newsletter unless you do the same there.

I drew  this card after writing - and re-writing, my May newsletter because it did not feel 'strong and true'. So I smiled at this card. Then I thought - what does this mean to me, today. The word and the colour together feel safe, comfortable. While flow-writing* these words appeared: 'Do not deceive yourself, be open and let your self access the wisdom of your soul.' Then I felt stuck, but carried on writing - I could hear birds singing, bees buzzing, the wind in the trees. A cloud passed over the sun and I felt a chill. Being honest with others, what about politenes? Be open and considerate, also assertive. Choose words carefully but honestly. Looking after my own needs so I can then look after others. Significance in the colour: associated with the sacral chakra: instinct and gut-feeling, creativitiy, reduces stress. During the week ahead I will be aware of where honesty is needed, and also self-care and nurturing.
(*flow-writing is writing without stopping, suspending the internal critic and seeing what flows for you)


So - here is my first offering - and it is daunting to put this raw unpolished writing out there. It has to be as it is or it does not reflect the true process of using the card to rediscover. 

"Honesty" - what does the word and the colour mean to you? Share your thoughts if you wish by commenting below or emailing me (mary@daretoblossom.co.uk)

Visit www.rediscoveryprocess.com for your own set of cards.

Thursday 2 May 2013

May 2013
 
In this issue:


Reflections: Strong and True
News: Dare to Blossom Rediscovery Cards - follow each card
Inspiring Links

Reflections: Strong and True

Writing for you this month has been proceeding in fits and starts, I'm not sure why. Some months it flows and feels the right thing to share with you, this time just the opposite. I had an idea, wrote several pages in my notebook.... but.... it didn't feel good somehow. Part seemed contrived and unclear; other parts seemed too personal, in a way that wouldn't be of interest or helpful to anyone.

As a whole it did not ring strong and true. Coming back to writing today, I have choices: I could polish the first piece, maybe make it 'OK' - and that would be fine. (But I might not feel that way). I could choose not to write anything this month, to take a break. Other writers whose work I follow do that - they do not wish to be 'tyrannised' by their own self-imposed deadlines.

Or... I could do this: reconnect with myself, get my 'worry mind' out of the way, and go deeper. My thoughts are: why should I add to the deluge of words on the Internet if I have nothing 'useful' to say? What is the point? is it self-indulgent?


My internal compass comes back to: does it sound clearly like a bell? Does it feel 'strong and true'. Is it my own voice, as authentic as I can be today, as I write here in Cornwall at the end of April 2013. That phrase 'strong and true' came to me recently, and echoes the affirmation I chose two years ago to reconnect me with my true voice, to be able to speak from my heart. That feeling I have written about here before - in John O'Donohue's words, "Coming home to myself", is very strong.

I follow my compass, knowing I am acting in as strong and true manner as I am able in this particular moment. I remember that all I need to do is be myself, the best I can be. Sharing the process of being imperfect, of my best sometimes not being exceptional. Just being the best this ordinary person can do today. And me doing that helps to free you, my dear friends, to be yourselves, to shine in your own special and unique way. All of us are extraordinary and amazing, and all of us have those days when we feel neither of those things. The phrases you find to help you come home to yourself will lead you back, reset your internal compass.

For you, to explore in your meditation and/or your journal:

  • Does your compass need recalibrating?
  • Is there a part of your life where you feel in need of direction?
  • Do you have an affirmation or mantra to help you?
  • Maybe the place you thought you were heading to is no longer your destination?
If you wish, you can use these questions to explore where you are right now, what rings true for you today, develop an affirmation that works for you in this time, reset your course.

News: Dare to Blossom Rediscovery Cards - follow each card

Starting from 1 May, I have set the intention of drawing a card each week and writing about how I use it to guide me and focus my reflections during that week. As there are 50 cards the whole process will take a year, or maybe more as I am going to be flexible and aim at three-four times a month (otherwise I am in the tyranny of self-imposed deadlines again!).

If you are interested in reading these thoughts, please will you let me know? Would you prefer a newsletter format like this that arrives in your email inbox? Or would a post on my blog suit you better, where you can visit when you feel like it and/or sign up to receive regular notifications? Or maybe you think it would be better to use the Dare to Blossom Facebook page? It might be good if you could leave your own reflections on using the cards - what do you think? Just 'reply' to this email and send me your thoughts if you would like to be involved.

To thank you for your help in my research into this, everyone who replies before 31 May will be entered in a draw. The first prize will be a Rediscovery Session (by phone or Skype) and a set of Dare to Blossom Rediscovery Cards, and there will be two further prizes of packs of the cards.


After I had written the piece above, "Strong and True", the card I drew for this week was 'Honesty' - which made me smile, having spent that time agonising about what to write and then deciding to share and be honest about how I was feeling during that process. I'll share my thoughts on that card and the significance of the background colour for me (with a photo for you) later this week when I begin the posting, which will begin on the Dare to Blossom blog while I am awaiting your response on your preferences.

Inspiring Links:

The wonderful spiritual artist Patrick Gamble has recently opened a gallery/studio in Polperro where his work will be on display. If you are ever in the area, do go along and visit. Details and opening times can be found here.

Here is a cartoon to make you smile, thank you to Coen of the
Euro Coach List who shared this recently. The Dilbert cartoons by Scott Adams always contain astute observations of human behaviour. After my deliberations recently about using the cards to help access intuition and our own internal guidance, etc - this one particularly made me laugh! On intuition. The two following entries are also relevant to coaching and the 'personal development industry'.

Thank you for reading. Please do visit leave any comments or feedback if you feel inspired.